In part two of this game diary, Alice began crossing the Shivering Isles on her way to New Sheoth and an appointment with Sheogorath, god of madness. Although that’s a very important date she did get a little sidetracked in the town of Split after discovering that everybody there had a double. All of the Splitizens had magical twins they hated, and all of them wanted Alice to murder those twins for them. It was all a bit creepy and we decided to split. Get it? It’s funny because the town is also named – never mind.
The town of Split fades into the draw distance, safely somewhere far behind us among the rolling hills and giant mushrooms of Mania. What is with all these crazy people with multiple identities, we think as Alice runs away and I look at the map.
Eventually finding the path northwards to New Sheoth again, I meet a man walking the road who thinks he’s too good to wear a full set of clothes. He says his name is Yngvar Doom-Sayer and he’d like to tell me about the apocalypse. Which sounds depressing.
In the town square of Bliss there’s a funny little man waddling around on his haunches. Hello, funny little man! What particular delusion do you happen to suffer from? It seems like everybody in the Isles suffers from a peculiar delusion. Aren’t you all very special individuals.
No time to faff around admiring the architecture; we’re late for a very important date. Right on that dividing line in the middle of the palace sits Sheogorath, the prince and god of madness, the man so mad he eats mad hatters for breakfast and then for the rest of the week his poop wears tiny hats. He’s clapping as we approach. Haskill, the chap with the collar who helpfully welcomed us to The Fringe, has somehow beat us here but he’s too detached to bother applauding.
Oh! You’re right, it is rather scenic.
Oh dear. Oh deary deary me.
Curiouser and curiouser. Ha!
This is going to be one of those falls that goes on and on and ends with a gentle bump, isn’t it?
The end. Hope you enjoyed this game diary, which is now completely finished. Just kidding, come back soon for part four and we’ll find out how Alice survives and whether it involves reloading a quicksave.
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